I hate when people post personal BS on Facebook dont' you? Well, guess what? I'm annoyed and ticked off so here we go........Sometimes I just have to laugh at some things. Tonight is one of them. I had a great time with friends and family until it came time to a) switch locations b) stop a friend from driving and c) attempting to understand how to be second fiddle in this funny game we call life.
For the most part I think most of you know me. I'm blunt, I can be an asshole, but I can also be thoughtful, kind, and considerate. I would imagine if you actually know me as a friend you would agree. I am single with no kids so my friendships and relationships outside of my family are extremely important to me. After today I just want to give a middle finger to everyone and just hole up in my little house and say "to hell with you all". But, I won't because it's my best friend's birthday tomorrow and we are going to have a great time. Here's the thing. I can be the bitchiest of bitches but if I consider you important in my life, then I guarantee you, you will always have someone in your corner. Will I have you in mine?
Here's what you'll get from me as a friend, etc.:
1. Honesty. It's the basis for any relationship.
2. You're back. Right Dave?
3. Your time. I will do what is important to you, in hopes that you will also do what is important to me. ... Unless it's climbing mountains. I don't do that anymore.
4. Learning from you. I can admit fault. Can you?
5. Supporting you. You want to be a marine biologist? Okay let's go diving in murky Campbell Lake.
6. Growth. I am constantly learning and growing from my friends.
7. I would say empathy but you know that isn't true. I am not empathetic.. I know this about myself. What I can give is my life experience (which hasn't been so peachy keen) and my resistance to trauma and how I deal with it. It very well may make you understand me more. If not, que sera sera.
8. Support. Whatever it is that is important to you and I can be a part of, I will. You want to save the seals? I promise to quit using plastic straws even though paper straws are disgusting.
Let me tell you what I expect from you in return.. it's simple really.. Kind of.
1. Laughter. If I can't laugh with you, then what's the point?
2. Your willingness to understand what is important to me and to listen when I speak of things that are important to me. Not to make you uncomfortable but to make me comfortable in our relationship. I will do the same.
3. A little give. You don't like karaoke and I do? Go with it. You don't like xyz bar and I do? Take one for the team. It isn't going to kill you.
4. Hearing me. I mean REALLY listening. Hearing the words that come out of my mouth and what I need from you and what I don't. eg: I don't need you to judge me for whatever...I need you to listen to me when I need more out of the relationship.
5. No judgement. Super easy you think, but it isn't. Everyone has a preconceived notion of what they expect. Guess what, I'm probably not it and I'm okay with it. I won't play the game long if your judgement is playing a role.
6. Honesty. Because I guarantee I will be honest with you.... and sometimes I have to tiptoe around what I really want to say, but it's for the best because I really don't think you can handle the truth, or, aren't willing to listen.
7. Listen. I don't ask for things I don't really need anything , but if I do, and I ask for them, that's different. If you can't give them to me, then maybe it's time to move on. Not all relationships are meant to last forever. I'm not talking about a Porsche. I'm talking about time, commitment, etc.
8. If you can't even bend, then there is no reason for us to be friends or whatnot. If it's all about you and what you want or need, it won't work. It isn't working. If you think putting a Band-Aid on an open wound will stop the blood flow, you're wrong; The hemorrhage will still occur.
9. The realization that maybe what you have to give is great, but your inability to compromise is what is going to be the end of it all.
With that said, 1000+ "friends" on the ol' Facebook none of this will shock you because you've known me for year. For those that it does, sorry. I'm just so tired of asking for and explaining what I need out of people in my life and it not being taken seriously. For those that take it seriously, cheers!! You know who you are.
For the rest of you--- Vaya con dios.. or whatever you believe in.
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