October 16, 2020

Oh, sobriety you silly cad you

My mind and liver are clear after 16 days of sobriety so I decided to take advantage of this time and entertain you with a blog post. Be warned, I talk about "hot topics" in my usual snarky, eye-rolling way. You can agree, disagree, get mad, get happy, or get drunk for me since I am not willing to lose $100 for a cold Coors Light.

2020. What to even say? 10 months down and 2 to go… Can’t imagine what the next two months could possibly bring. Maybe an abominable snowman attack? Maybe the movie 30 Days of Night will come true? Whatever it is, I imagine I will get as excited about it as I am with the COVID. Or the 2018 earthquake. Or the Election. Or our bum-deal Mayor (pun intended). You see, it’s not that I don’t care, because I do… to an extent. Let me explain, so unbunch your undies and simmer down for a second.

I will preface all of what’s to come with the fact that I understand my situation is different than others. I am single, I live alone, I have no kids, my parents live far away, I didn’t lose my job, and I have friends that think like me so I do still have a social network. With that said, I am so sick and tired of hearing about all this stuff (see list above). We are all entitled to our opinions and we all have the capability to listen, learn, fear, worry, etc. etc. What you do with those things is what matters. There is so much on the interwebs that you can’t possibly differentiate fact from fiction, truth from lies, or right from wrong. So what to do? I don’t really care. I don’t. You be you and believe your own truths. It’s not up to me to change your mind and quite frankly, I don’t have the desire to do so. It is not worth it to me or to anyone else to get worked up about all the inequalities and inequities surrounding all the major issues going on. Do you think making a Facebook rant or holding a sign, or rallying in any way is changing anyone’s mind? I mean, really, do you? Why does it seem that everyone’s voices have to be so LOUD all of a sudden? If being loud isn’t getting your cause heard, maybe you should try something else? Kill ‘em with kindness. You catch more bees with honey. Don’t worry, be happy. Make love, not war. You is smart, you is kind, you is important.  See? It’s that easy. I know coming from me it’s pretty rich, right? I know. But I’ve come a long way in being nice. Just be glad you never played soccer against me.

Have you defriended me on Facebook and deleted my name out of your phone yet? No, good.. I shall continue.

Do I want Covid? Nope. Do I want you or anyone else to get it? Nope. Does that stop me from living my life as I did before? Nope. I choose to go out and live my life. I take the precautions, wear my mask, lube up on sanitizer, wash my hands. If you are worried about catching it then my thought is you should probably just stay home or get one of those cool masks that circulate filtered air. Sorry, but not really. We all know we have the potential of getting it (regardless of said precautions), but we also know we could get shot, an STD, and lung cancer… but you don’t see people not going to Mt. View, or having unprotected sex, or quitting smoking. So, you do what you can do to not get it while not becoming a weirdo hermit by never leaving your house. Or become that weirdo hermit; you be you.

People in Anchorage are so apoplectic about the situation with the ol’ Mayor. Why? Because he "sext" someone and took a picture of his ass? Whoopdy doo. If you only knew what “important” people are really doing every day around this town. It’s a small town; we all have stories of indiscretions about the “Who’s Who” in Anchorage. So, what is it that is making people care so much about this? Is it affecting them personally? Is his resignation causing them more harm than when he was Mayor? I mean really, I am asking because I have NO CLUE why anyone would care so much. Also, it makes me do a little shoulder shrug and raise my eyebrow while ruminating about the people I know, who care so deeply for the state of affairs of our lil’ municipality, yet don’t do anything to help the situation. I mean sure, go hold a sign at the Park Strip. Post your opinion on every Facebook post or newspaper article. Better yet? Vote. Volunteer. Join a community council. Write your Legislators. Pick up trash. Donate to a good cause.



Let’s talk Presidential Election for a sec. It’s bad either way, we all know that. So how does berating someone over their decision to vote for an egomaniac or a handsy grandpa help? Yeah, chastising someone over their opinion in an open forum usually results in positive outcomes..👍  These people post about being accepting of all, loving thy neighbors, and all these frufru quasi-Christianesque do-gooder things and then one person mentions Trump and they go OFF THE RAILS, boil your rabbit, crazy. Whoa, whoa, New Age Mother Teresa, what happened to your peace-minded, piousness now? It’s cool, you can go back to your sanctimonious self on the social media now. See you in hell.

Stepping off my very tall, wobbly soapbox now. I’ll close with this:

If you know me, you know I can be the biggest a-hole there is, which is why you’re probably scoffing at this post. But from being that bull-in-the-China-shop, outspoken, direct woman, I’ve learned that sometimes it’s best to just shut the mouth.. usually real fast. Can you have an opinion? Of course. But if you do, and you can’t have a considerate, adult conversation about it, then just don’t bring it up. Let bygones be bygones. And for the love of all things holy, please don’t post about it on Facebook (insta-de-friend). I also do care about people and things. I don’t want anyone to get hurt (I’ve heard those riot signs can be a sliver danger), I don’t want anyone to get sick, and I don’t want anyone to care so much about any of these things I’ve written about that it affects our friendship. But if it does affect our friendship negatively, and of course that is your prerogative, I wish you well and I will relish in the .55¢ I will save not having to send you a Christmas card.


Any and all opinions in this blog post are solely those of the author. 
Any and all of your opinions about this post, unless positive and uplifting, 
can be kept inside that capacious head of yours until you can discuss it with someone who really cares.